


Sam and Max: A Supernatural Fanfic

by SamAndMax



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Explicit Sexual Content, Multi, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-04-05
Updated: 2013-05-28
Packaged: 2017-12-07 12:47:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 15,740
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/748674
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SamAndMax/pseuds/SamAndMax
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The gates of hell have been closed, but monsters still roam the earth. The Winchesters are leading the revolution against these monsters. A hunter named Maxine Colt is the Vamp pro who has just been charged with the ultimate task: Take down the Vamp Alpha and snuff out the Vamp race. The only problem? A sticky past with Sam Winchester gets in the way of making this a smooth hunt. Max must contain her heart, keep her head, and work with the man she once thought was the love of her life.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

When the gates of Hell closed for the last time, we thought the worst was behind us. Word traveled fast from hunter to hunter that the Winchesters had been successful, that they had completed the three trials and shoved Crowley and his demons down into the sulfured pits of eternal misery. We’d all celebrated, slept in for days, and started to pack up our hunting weapons. The Winchesters became living legend among the hunting community and their story was told with pride and admiration.

But, our joy was short lived. We quickly learned that, while demons were no longer roaming the lands, the other evils were stepping up their game. It became apparent that demons had kept all the other monsters that live in the dark in line, and without Crowley’s commands, these monsters had free reign for the first time in our world’s history.

I had learned that the Winchester brothers were living in their compound, trying to lead the revolution against these monsters. They were recruiting the best of us to form clans across the world. Each clan was assigned a specific monster. The plan was simple: target the Alpha. If we could kill the Alphas, we could cripple their species’ front. The movement was slow going, and we were severely outnumbered. 

Through word of mouth, I’d learned the WInchesters wanted to speak with me personally. An open invitation stood for me to come to the compound to meet with them, but I’d been hesitant to go. While the brothers were heroes, they were also considered the monster world’s most wanted. Being close to them meant your life was in immediate and eternal danger. I’d spent most of my life on the move, one step ahead of the monsters I specialized in. But, I was the best at what I did. I knew they needed me. So, I’d gone. 

The compound was well hidden deep in the wilderness of Washington State. It was impossible to reach without specific instructions from the brothers. They had an angel in their pocket, after all, and that angel had essentially camouflaged the compound to common eyes. It had taken me 17 days to jump through all the hoops Cas had set up. I was irritable and exhausted by the time I stood at the east entrance of the compound. I was welcomed personally by Dean Winchester. He’d eyed me up and down and I knew what he was thinking: “Can this 5’4” girl really be the best we’ve got?” I’d smirked back and him and proudly introduced myself. 

“I’m Maxine Colt, Vampire Hunter. I believe you are expecting me.”


	2. Three Years Later

My head ached and someone was pounding on my door. I lay still, face down in my pillow, willing whoever it was to go away. I could feel the wound in my shoulder pulsing and wondered if it had bled through my bandage in the night. Gabby, our resident medic, had stitched me up best she could, but the wound was jagged and had been difficult to deal with. It would leave a wicked scar, one to go along with the others located here and there on my body. The body of a hunter was often not a pretty thing to behold. I’d always been lucky, though. My wounds had never been serious enough to cause any sort of alarm, and when I was fully clothed, no one would know I was anything but a normal girl with a little bit of an edge.

Th pounding sounded again on my door and I groaned into my pillow and shouted “What!” loud enough to be heard through the walls. I heard the door swing open and then a soft chuckle as my visitor took in the sight of me.

“Long night?” Cas asked as he walked over to my bed and looked down at me. I turned my head towards him and peeked up through one eye. He was smiling at me. I would have been annoyed if it had been anyone but him. But, I loved Cas. In the three years I’d lived at the compound, we’d become close friends. I could always trust Cas to be honest and open with me about anything going on. I trusted him as much as I trusted Dean. Maybe even more because I knew Dean sometimes with held the truth from us in order to keep us safe. 

I rolled over on my back and fully took in the sight of the angel. He’d retired the trenchcoat and tie shortly after hell had been closed. He was currently in a ratty pair of blue jeans, a gray sweater, and bare feet. Around his left hand ring finger sat a silver band with binding symbols engraved into it. I smiled, knowing that Dean wore a matching band on his left hand.

“Don’t you have someone else you can bother? I’m sleeping off a three day bender of hunting,” I said to him, sitting up to give him room to sit at the foot of my bed.

“Heard you were injured,” Cas said, concern clouding his eyes as he looked at my shoulder. I was wearing a tanktop, so the bandage was visible. I eyed it for a second, not surprised to see a pink tinge in the center of the white gauze. I’d bled some and would need to get a new dressing. But, that could wait until I was done sleeping.

“Just a flesh wound. Vamp got his nails into me before I could get a good shot at cutting off his head. I’ll be fine.” I shrugged at Cas and rose from the bed to find some jeans to put on. “What’s up?

“He needs to see you. Told me to come get you and bring you down immediately,” Cas said, his voice neutral as always.

“What’s it about?” I asked.

“Not sure of the details. Something big though dealing with your Alpha,” Cas replied.

“It’s always something big. Dean doesn’t believe in anything but big news. I’m sure it’s the same old stuff.” I pulled my hair into a messy bun at the crown of my head and grabbed my Converse. Cas had risen and walked to my door, holding it open for me, ready to lead the way.

“I don’t know. He seems more excited than normal. He received a message on the wire and shouted for me to come get you ASAP. So here I am.”

“Ever the bossy man, huh?” I smirked looking at Cas warmly. I could see the love in his eyes whenever he spoke of Dean. Their relationship always gave me hope. If they could find contentment in our crazy world, anyone could. 

“You have no idea,” he winked. We headed down the corridor towards the Meeting Room. 

When we entered, Dean was standing over our operative table. It was lit up with a map of the country laid across it. He was running a red drafting pencil across it, marking the tracks of something being hunted. He didn’t look up when we walked in, instead motioning for me with his hand. I walked over to the table and looked down at the map, studying the clean line Dean had drawn.

“Whatcha got?” I asked, running my eyes along the red line from Louisiana to the border of Maine and Canada.

“Your Alpha,” Dean said calmly. He put the drafting pencil down, studied his work for a moment, and then looked up at me. His eyes went straight to the bandage on my shoulder. I saw the regret etched in his features. “I should have gone with you.”

“It’s nothing. Just a scratch. I handled it,” I said.

“How many’d you get?” Dean asked, eye brows raised.

“Four,” I grumbled. “Would of been five if the chicken shit hadn’t run off when he saw his buddies’ heads rolling around.”

“You’re the only girl I know who thinks killing four vamps by yourself in one night isn’t good enough,” Dean chuckled. “You’re only one person, Max.”

“I’ve done better than four in less than a night. If I hadn’t gotten scratched, I would of stayed out longer. But you and your rules…”

“If you’re wounded, you come in. That’s the rule. We can’t have our best people falling in the line of duty because they were too stubborn to come home and heal.” Dean took a step towards me and laid a hand on my uninjured shoulder. “Plus, you’re family. Can’t have you not coming back.” 

I knew Dean had experienced loss enough in his life. I honestly didn’t know how he’d stayed sane. Everyone he’d ever held dear had either died or left, everyone except Cas. For a second, I thought of the other Winchester brother and felt my heart squeeze tight in my chest. That guilt was mine to carry, guilt that Dean refused to let me wallow in. He knew his brother was out there, that he was hunting, but safe. And, for a while after his brother had left, Dean had confidently insisted that he’d be back one day.

But, after a while, Dean stopped speaking of his brother. Everyone did. His name stopped be uttered in front of me. They could see the pain sweep through my features every time he was mentioned, and so he’d stopped being discussed in order to give me time to heal. A year and a half later, I was really talented at pretending I was back to normal, totally unaffected by the Winchester brother’s departure and the events that had led up to it.

“So, you’ve tracked my Alpha? Where’s he holed up?” I asked, looking back down at the map.

“He’s in Maine, just south of the Canadian border. He’s got his usual coven with him. They’ve left a trail of blood in their wake. But he seems to have settled for the long haul. Hasn’t moved in weeks,” Dean said, his voice serious and on duty.

“Ok, so what’s the plan?” I asked. Dean looked at me from the corner of his eyes, his tell-tale sign of hiding something or about to drop something big. I braced myself for the news, ready for whatever he was going to throw at me.

“Well, I have something to discuss with you. Something important. I thought we’d go to the Den and maybe have a beer,” he said grinning at me. 

“It’s 10:30 in the morning,” I wryly answered.

“We don’t live on a schedule. Beer’s beer. You coming?” he asked as he started walking towards the door. Just before disappearing into the hallway, he turned and shot his angel a look. Cas nodded, smiled, and then disappeared from sight. Dean and I headed for the Den. 

When we were settled with our beers, Dean leaned forward and started to explain the situation.

“I’ve had people working on how to bring the monsters down through their Alphas. A couple of months ago, Seth caught his Wendingo. After weeks of torture, the bastard finally revealed something interesting,” Dean explained. “‘We’ve tried it out on a few lower level makers. It’s working. If the makers are gutted, their children die with them.”

I raised my eyebrows at him. This was big news. “What does this have to do with my Alpha?” I asked.

“We’ve tried it on a few vamp makers. The results are the same. If you can get to your Alpha, you can take down the Vamp population.” He watched me carefully, waiting for the question he knew I was going to ask.

“You have first hand knowledge of this?” I asked, watching as Dean nodded at me. “Ok. Who’s the hunter? How do we know he’s reliable?”

Dean glanced briefly over my shoulder and then I heard the voice I’d made myself forget for the past year and a half.

“It’s me, Max. And I know it will work,” Sam Winchester said from behind me. I felt my blood run cold and the breath suck from my body. I knew I needed to turn and face him, but I couldn’t. Not yet.


	3. Facing a Different Sort of Demon

Dean eyed me cautiously, ready to stand between me and his brother if needed. I watched him carefully, considering my options. He’d set me up in a way I hadn’t expected. I’d always known Sam would come back to the compound eventually. In fact, I was sure this wasn’t the first time he’d been back since I’d last seen him. But, those visits had been kept from me, done during a time I was either off sight or sleeping from a long hunt. I’d been grateful to Dean for not making me unnecessarily suffer. And, while I knew I was in this room with Sam because it was important to our cause, I felt betrayed by Dean. He could have warned me. He could have shared the information with me on his own and left Sam out of it entirely. For Dean to make the decision to put Sam and me in the same room together meant there was going to be more to this than I understood at the moment.

“Max, just listen to him,” Dean said softly. He started to reach for me to offer a comforting hand, but withdrew it quickly when he saw my body stiffen. Physical contact from a Winchester was not what I needed or wanted right now. For a second, I wished Cas was in the room; but, then I realized he’d probably known all along that Sam was here and that I was being ambushed. He was getting a piece of my mind later.

“Maxie—” Sam started. I whipped around and glared at him. He took a noticeable step back. 

“You don’t get to call me that. Understand?” I asked. Sam nodded at me slowly and then stood waiting for me to speak. I took in the sight of him, making sure to keep my face from revealing anything I was thinking. He looked healthy and rested. He’d cut his hair since the last time I’d seen him. It was shorter and shaggier than normal. I could see the edges of his chest tattoo peaking from under his t-shirt. It reminded me of another tattoo on his body, one that mirrored the only ink on my body. I shoved that thought from my brain.

I brought my eyes back up to his and considered what I wanted to say. I knew he would patiently wait for me to speak. We’d stand there all day if needed just watching each other. If there was one thing I was sure of in that moment, it was that a year and a half hadn’t eased the hurt of what had happened between us. I could feel the stinging starting in my eyes and quickly turned away to look at Dean.

“What is it you want me to do?” I asked him, my voice thick but steady. I had work to do. And, regardless of who was in the room, I wasn’t going to forget that.

“A plan needs to be worked out. With your Alpha settled in Maine, we need to work fast. Strike before anything is leaked through the wires,” Dean said.

“Ok. I’ll need to know the details of the coven, the carnage they’ve left across the country, and I’ll need the specs of where they’re staying. Once I have those things, I can assemble my team and get on the road. It’ll take a few days to make the drive. If all goes well, I can be in and out and back home in a week,” I said as I started a mental checklist of people I thought could handle the job with me.

“All of the information you need is here already, waiting in the Meeting Room.” Dean was watching me closely and I suddenly realized it was because he was unsure of how I was going to react to the rest of what he had to say.

“And?” I asked slowly.

“The case is Sam’s. He’s the one with all of our intel. He’ll be helping you lead the assault.”

“The hell he will!” I shouted, clenching my fists.

“Max—” Dean started.

“No! In case you’ve forgotten, I’m the Vamp pro. You sent for me, remember? When I got here, you put me in charge of the Vamp clan. I can handle this on my own, with my usual people. I do not need a babysitter for this job, especially not a Winchester babysitter.” I shot a pointed look at Sam and turned back to Dean, who was looking at me calmly. I felt my anger shift to something else, something more, something I wasn’t sure I would be able to handle. “Dean, please,” I whispered, begging him with my eyes. “I can do this.”

“I know you can, kid. But, Sam can help you. He’s been tracking your Alpha for nearly a year. He knows his pattern of movement, his particular tastes. He practically knows what the Vamp’s going to do before he even does it.” Dean looked at his brother and jerked his head to the left. I could hear the door behind us close and knew that Sam had left the room.

“Max, I wouldn’t do this is I didn’t think it was absolutely necessary,” Dean said quietly.

I felt the first tear slide down my cheek. “You can’t hunt with someone you don’t trust,” I whispered.

“You don’t trust Sam?” Dean asked.

“You know that’s not what I meant. Sam doesn’t trust me, Dean. Remember? When St. Louis fell apart—”

“This isn’t St. Louis. And Sam knows that wasn’t your fault,” Dean said as he walked over to me. He lifted my chin so I’d look at him and I felt the tears start to fall in earnest.

“How could you not remember what happened after that hunt? The things that were said in the Dining Room? Sam made sure I and everyone within the compound knew how he felt that day. He doesn’t trust me. And, if he doesn’t trust me, we can’t hunt together. It’s not safe. You know that.”

Dean walked over to a chair and sunk down into it, taking a drag from his beer while he figured out exactly what to say next. He knew I was right, that the relationship between hunters had to be solid and unbreakable. And, he knew exactly what Sam had said to me that day a year and a half ago. He’d been standing right there with us, attempting to referee the situation. But, he’d failed. Sam had said hateful things to me, things that had burned into the very core of my being. And when he’d been done belittling and humiliating me, he’d turned and walked out the door. That had been the last time I’d seen him until today.

Just the memory of the day made my heart ache in ways that physically hurt. My Sam had not been in that room with me that day. My Sam had disappeared somewhere in the streets of St. Louis. The Sam that had come back to the compound and said all of those nasty things to me was a Sam I’d never seen, one I’d never wanted to see. And, that Sam had broken me, right down the center. I’d known then that I’d never recover from that day, that I’d never go back to the Max I was before. But, I’d learned to deal with it, learned to push it down deep inside me and bury it in my work. 

“Max?” Dean asked, breaking through my thoughts. I looked up at him, my face tear-streaked. “I need you to do this. For me. For you. For all of us. You can end the Vamp population. But, you’re going to need Sam in order to do that. After you’re done, you don’t have to see him again. You don’t even have to see me again. It’ll be done. Your monster will be gone, and you can take your shot at the hunter’s dream.”

“And what’s that?” I asked, knowing I’d already given in to him.

“A shot at a normal life,” he said quietly, a small smile playing on his lips. I watched him a moment and smiled back at him.

“I need until tomorrow,” I said. “Please. I’ll meet with him tomorrow.”

“Sure thing, kid,” Dean said.

I quickly wiped the tears from my face and tried to gather myself to make the trek back to my room. I had no idea where Sam was in the compound, but if I came across him, I wouldn’t let him see me defeated. I wouldn’t let any of them see me defeated. I squared my shoulders and walked calmly back to my quarters. It was only once the door was closed and locked that I sunk down to my knees and sobbed quietly into my arms.


	4. A Reckless Plan

I’d fallen asleep on the floor of my room, blocking the door. But, when I awoke the next morning, I was in my bed, a fresh bandage on my shoulder, and a glass of water with a few white pills waiting for me on my bedside table. The door was still bolted from the inside, so I knew Cas had flashed in and out of my room to help me. I lay still for a while, staring at my ceiling, while the memory of the day before flooded through my brain. Seeing Sam again had opened a wound I’d rather have left closed. But, he was here now, there was a job to be done, and I needed to get my head back in place if I was going to take down an entire population of monsters.

I pushed the old memory of Sam from my mind and focused on the task at hand. I’d gone down this road before, knew the Alpha personally. And the Winchesters had tried in the past to save a girl from a vamp life by killing her maker. It hadn’t worked then, and I wasn’t sure how it was going to work now. If Sam had really taken down a maker and successfully snuffed out the maker’s children, I needed to know how. 

I jumped up from my bed, pulling my tank top and jeans from my body, as I walked over to my dresser. I needed to look ready for the job, put together, solid. I riffled through my clothes for a moment, deciding on a black t-shirt and a pair of dark jeans. I strapped my favorite pig sticker to my left ankle before pulling on my worn, steel toed boots. In the waistband of my jeans, I tucked my Vamp blade. It had been in this war longer than I had, passed down to me by my grandfather when he’d gotten too old to hunt. His initials were carved into the worn wooden handle, and, just under them, I’d carved my own after my first kill with the weapon. 

While I was pulling on my jacket, a soft knock sounded on my door. I pulled it open to see Cas standing in front of me, a cup of coffee in his hand, held out to me.

“Is this your idea of a peace offering?” I asked, taking the cup. 

“Is there peace to be made?” Cas smiled at me. I eyed him carefully, waiting for him to speak again. But, in true Cas form, he stood patiently, looking at me calmly, waiting for whatever wrath I was going to bestow upon him.

“Did you know?” I asked.

“About Sam?” 

“Yes. Did you know?” He just looked at me, telling me my answer without saying a word. “Why didn’t you tell me, Castiel? How could you let me walk into that room knowing I was going to have to face him?”

“Max, the cause is more important than the problems you are having with Sam. He is here for the job. Nothing more. Once it is over, he will be gone and you will not have to deal with him again.” 

I’d long ago become used to Cas’ ability to be blunt and honest. But, hearing his words now made my heart ache. Cas understood love. He understood the pain that went along with love. He and Dean had been forced to take a slow, painful journey together that often did not seem like it was going to work out for either of them. But he had stayed the course, protected his human, had faith in their relationship, and when Dean had finally professed his feelings to Cas, Cas had done what he’d known he’d always do: he’d given himself completely to the man he’d fallen from heaven for. 

But Sam and I were different. Our journey had been much shorter and, in the end, it had become obvious that our fates were not to be entwined with each other. Sam had seemed to have no problem with this, leaving the compound and moving on with his life. I, on the other hand, had struggled every day since he’d left, cried myself to sleep more times than I could count, and for the first few months he’d been gone, I’d watched the gates hoping to see him coming back. I’d finally given up. But, now he was back, suddenly and shockingly. 

“I’m here to do a job, as well, Cas. And I’m good at my job. It would have been nice, though, to not have been blind sighted yesterday. I’m a grown woman. You could have told me. You and Dean both should have told me. I would have dealt with it,” I said as I started walking down the hall. 

“Where are you going?” Cas called after me.

“I have work to do. If Sam and I are going to take down the Vamp population, there’s a lot to be done.” I smiled at him over my shoulder, watched as he playfully saluted me, and then I turned the corner. Steeling myself, I headed for the Meeting Room.

When I entered, the brothers were huddled together over the operative table. To their left was a box of what I assumed was the research Sam had acquired in his time away from the compound. 

“Alright, boys,” I said cheerfully. “Let’s kill some Vamps.”

They both looked up at me, Sam confused and Dean grinning. I walked over and stood between them. For a split second, I felt at home, swept up in memories of a more stable past. 

“Ok. Well, here’s what we’ve got,” Sam said quickly, pulling the box of research closer to us all and pulling his tattered journal from the top of the pile. He flipped through a few pages before finding what he was looking for. He handed me the book hesitantly. I peered up at him and smiled quickly. I saw the shock cross his face before I focused on the pages before me.

I scanned the words Sam had carefully scripted on the pages giving a loud, quick laugh. “A basilisk? Seriously?”

Dean chuckled to himself and stepped back to watch the scene play out before him. He’d seen this before, seen Sam and I argue back and forth about the details of a hunt. I knew it was one of his favorite things to witness, mostly because he enjoyed the fact that I could and often did put Sam in his place. Or, at least I used to.

“Yes, a basilisk,” Sam said.

“Where the hell did you find a basilisk?” I asked, eyeing him.

“I know a guy,” he said. I raised an eye brow at him. “It doesn’t matter. The point is that I have what we need to get the job done.”

“Ok. So tell me, Mr. Secretive. What exactly do I do with this basilisk?” I was aware that Dean had stepped away from us and was now sitting happily on top of his desk. He’d pulled a piece of pie from his small refrigerator and ate it, enjoying the show. I smiled slyly at him and he winked back.

“Obviously, you don’t use the whole basilisk. Just its fangs,” Sam said, looking between me and Dean, a frown on his mouth.

“Like Harry Potter?” I asked and heard Dean snort. Sam nodded and I laughed. “Seriously? I’m supposed to shove the fang of this huge snake into the Alpha? Just walk right up and give him a poke?”

“Essentially,” Sam said.

I looked at him for a moment, watched the challenge flash into his eyes, and suddenly felt my heart squeeze. This was my Sam, the Sam I’d fought with on a daily basis and loved fiercely. He must have seen the recognition in my eyes because he smirked at me, a flash of dimple showing in his cheek.

“Have you lost your mind?” I asked. “I’m supposed to walk up to the Alpha, stab him with a fang, and hope that I hit the spot that will bring him to his knees, will snuff him and his children out of existence.”

“Of course there’s more to it than that, but yes. You’re going to take out the Vamps with a fang.” Sam continued to smirk at me before glancing over at his brother.

Dean looked back and forth between the two of us before proudly proclaiming, “Damn, it’s good to have the family back!”

“I don’t know what you’re so happy about,” Sam said to his brother. “We’re taking your car.” He glanced at me and smiled fully for the first time since I’d seen him again. The sight caught my breath. I smiled back, just as fully as he did. If there was one thing Sam and I could do together and do well, it was give Dean hell over the Impala.

“Over my dead body,” Dean said seriously.

“That can be arranged,” Sam and I said simultaneously. When I glanced back at Sam, he winked at me. And for a moment, I was actually glad he’d come back. But, just for a moment.


	5. Ink and Blood

Over the next few days, the brothers and I fell into a routine. We’d come together in the Meeting Room mid-morning, check the news from the wire, adjust our notes, and continue working our way through building and sewer schematics. The hunters we had in Maine were keeping a watchful eye on the coven. The Vamps were not actively hunting at the moment, which told us they had humans on sight with them to drink from. While Dean had wanted to go in immediately to save any human lives that were currently in danger, Sam and I had convinced him that the larger picture was more important. If we stormed in now, before we were fully prepared, we could spook the Alpha, and then all of Sam’s work for the last year would be useless.

I wondered often why exactly Sam had been hunting my Alpha this whole time, but I had yet to ask him about it. That wasn’t a conversation I thought I was ready to have with him yet because I assumed it would dig up some things I wasn’t prepared to handle. Plus, I was keeping my interaction with Sam to an absolute minimum. I’d work with him and Dean during those times in the Meeting Room; but, once we’d called it a day, I quickly retreated back to my room or to another area of the compound away from the Winchesters. I missed my steady interaction with Cas and Dean, but it was a necessary sacrifice if it meant I didn’t have to see Sam.

Cas popped up now and again in the Meeting Room to offer his guidance. Since he had fallen from heaven, he’d stopped actively hunting. Dean insisted he stay at the compound so he was protected. Heaven had allowed Cas to retain many of his angel abilities, but immortality hadn’t been one of them. If Cas was killed, there would be no coming back. He did, however, have the power to heal seriously wounded hunters. While Gabby was our medic, Cas was our doctor, brought in when the situation was too serious for Gabby to handle.

Cas also had become the spiritual guide for many hunters on the grounds. It was not uncommon to see the angel and a hunter quietly talking in the far corners of rooms. He always listened to us, offered us his shoulder when we needed it, and never judged us harshly based on his personal feelings. He was our relief during a time when relief was few and far between. We all loved him, and we would protect him at all costs. 

*****************

Four days after Sam’s arrival, I was hanging out in the compound’s courtyard area, enjoying the sunshine while pouring through Sam’s journal. His research and observation over the past year had been stellar, and there were a number of things I knew I needed to record in my own journal for future reference. But for now, I was on my stomach in the grass. It was warm enough for me to do something particularly girlie for the first time in a while: sunbathe. So, I’d chosen to strip off my hunter’s clothing, and was instead lying in the sun in cut-off jean shorts and a bikini top. I knew anyone who walked up would see the red scar that ran six inches down the left side of my back; but, since we were all hunters, it wasn’t a big deal. They didn’t ask questions and I never provided answers. 

“Anything good?”

I turned my head to see Sam standing behind me, just at the edge of the grass. I’d gotten used to him being around, so my heart didn’t rattle behind my ribcage quite as much as it had been doing. But still, seeing him stand ten feet away from me seemed too close for comfort. He was wearing mirrored shades, so I couldn’t see his eyes; but, his face seemed relaxed, a hint of dimple in his cheek. I shrugged my shoulder at him.

“Just catching up on some stuff. I wanted to make sure I understood the incantation that has to be done over the fang after we dip it in the blood,” I said, turning back to my reading.

“It’s fairly simple,” he said as he walked over to me and sank down into the grass beside me. “I have it memorized. I can do the spell when the time comes.”

“It’s good to have a back up just in case,” I explained.

“In case of what?” Sam asked. “I’ll be there with you.”

“Maybe,” I mumbled to myself. He chuckled lightly to himself and grabbed the journal, turning it so he could read the page.

“Your Latin’s horrible, anyway. You’d probably botch it,” he said, while removing his glasses to look at me directly.

“I’ve been practicing,” I said defensively. He was right. My Latin was spectacularly bad, but I was sure I could get this spell right.

“Yeah?” he asked. When I nodded, he grinned at me and asked, “So, what else have you been doing?

I watched him for a moment, studied his face carefully. It was a face I’d had etched into my brain for years. But my memory of it hadn’t served him well. If I closed my eyes, I could picture him, picture the different emotions that I’d seen flit across his features a thousand times. But looking at the real him, the very flesh and blood of him, was much more detailed. I’d missed this face, and so I’d tried desperately to forget it.

“Hunting mostly,” I said finally, deciding that was the safest response to give.

“That how you got the shoulder wound?” he asked. He reached out and lightly touched the cut that was healing. I’d taken the bandage off. The stitches would need to come out in a day or two.

“Yeah,” I breathed out. Heat streaked across my skin from where his fingers made contact. His hand hovered for a moment longer before he withdrew it.

“Should have gotten Cas to zap you,” he said, a hint of a smile on his lips. He knew I didn’t let Cas heal me, didn’t let him take my battle wounds from me. I wore them to remind myself that I was human and fallible. Hunters forgot that sometimes when they were charging into the nests of hell. “What about the one on your back? That’s a new one, too, isn’t it?”

I felt my skin prickle as I realized he didn’t remember how it’d gotten there. I sat up and faced him so my scar would be behind us. “Shapeshifter got me when I wasn’t looking,” I said softly, hoping he wouldn’t question it.

“Where’d you come up on a shapeshifter? Thought they’d been sticking close to…” His eyes shot to mine and I watched the realization hit him. “St. Louis?” he whispered. 

I didn’t answer him. I couldn’t. The blood was raging in my ears and I was desperately fighting the urge to jump to my feet and run. He sat very still for a moment, and I could see his brain working overtime. His eyes took in my face. I watched them run across my forehead, down the line of my cheeks, and settle on my mouth. I felt frozen under his gaze. When he reached for me, I couldn’t move away. His hand cupped my cheek and I reacted the only way I knew how; I sank into his palm, turning my face into him so I could really feel him. I closed my eyes and let everything settle in around me.

“Max,” he whispered softly, and I felt a shudder run through my body. If I kept my eyes closed, I could have this moment. I could sear it into my brain and take it with me. But, I also knew I was being stupid. The hurt that was shredding through my chest pleaded with me to stop. My mind flashed to a year and a half ago, to the Dining Room, to Sam standing in front of me, arms out at his sides, his face contorted in anger as he yelled at me. _You aren’t worth the waste of ammo, you know that? Do you hear me, Max? Can your thick skull comprehend what I’m saying? I should have left you there, left you to the monsters. Next time, stay home and let the grown-ups handle the hunt._

My eyes flashed open, and I recoiled from him like he’d hit me. My cheeks burned and my body shook as I tried to stand. His face pleaded with mine as I backed away from him.

“You stay away from me,” I seethed. 

“I just need you to—” he started before I cut him off.

“No!” I shouted. “Leave me alone. Do you hear me, Sam? Can your thick skull comprehend what I’m saying?” I watched awareness dawn in his eyes as he understood I was throwing his words back at him. His face turned to stone, and he rose from the ground, towering over me.

“If you’ll just let me explain,” he said. I laughed at him, rolling my eyes before sneering at him. I finally got to my feet and turned away from him, giving him a full view of the scar on my back. 

Glancing over my shoulder at him, I saw him studying the jagged, puckered whelp that ran beside my spine. “It’s my reminder,” I said angrily. He raised his eyes to mine, his brows raised in a question. “My reminder of everything I lost that day, everything you took from me. And this?” I turned back to him and pointed to the ink marked low on my right side, the ink that mirrored that on his left side. “This is my punishment.”

“Punishment?” he asked quietly.

“Punishment,” I stated. “It’s constant, but broken. My cross to bear for thinking for even a second that a hunter could experience anything like what it represents.

He raised his t-shirt up until I could see the intricate swirl of ink on his body, my ink’s missing mate. He pointed to it, jabbing his finger into his flesh. “It’s not broken, Max,” he shouted at me. “But, you’re right. It is constant. It will always be constant.”

I threw my head back as I started to laugh. But, the tears were stinging my eyes. I felt one slip from the corner of one of my eyes and swiped at it viciously. When I looked back at him, he was seething, his face red, his eyes flashing fire at me. I pressed my lips together tightly for a moment to keep myself from yelling at him. Another tear dripped down my face, and I exhaled sharply.

“Sam, in my life, there is only one constant.” I reached down into the pocket of my shorts and withdrew the tiny blade I’d had tucked away. “And you were never it,” I said as I sliced quickly through the ink on my side. The sting of the blade felt good. I sliced again, in the opposite direction. The blood sprang from the cuts, a red X marked through everything Sam and I had once been. I threw the blade at his feet and turned to walk away, leaving him in the sunshine.


	6. Puzzle Pieces are Made to Fit Together

When I stepped out of the shower, I was not surprised to see Dean sitting on the counter of my bathroom. He tossed me a towel and gave me a stiff smile. I ignored him and started to towel off my body, walking into my bedroom. He followed behind me and sat on my bed, waiting, while I dressed in sweats and a ratty Kansas t-shirt. When i roughly started combing out my wet hair, he sighed behind me, and the mattress squeaked as he shifted his weight. 

“We need to talk about it, “he finally said.

“No, we don’t.” I caught his reflection in the mirror and frowned at him.

“He told me you hurt yourself,” and glanced down as if he could see the mutilated ink through my t-shirt. I snorted and turned to face him.

“I’m sure he did.” Dean watched me for a moment before rising and jerking the hem of my t-shirt up. “I was just naked in the bathroom. You could have taken a peek at it then.”

He ran his thumb over the gashes I’d created in my flesh and glared at me.

“You can’t do shit like this, Max.” When I rolled my eyes, he grabbed my face in his hand and forced me to meet his eyes. “Maxine, I’m serious. There is enough out there that’d already like to take a chunk out of you. You can’t hurt yourself.”

“Jesus, Dean. Calm down. I’m not hurting myself. I was making a point.” I jerked my face from his fingers.

“Then tell me what this is about. Tell me how pulling a knife on yourself isn’t hurting you. Because, I gotta tell you, kid. Seems pretty messed up to me,” he said.

“Sam and I had a conversation. I needed him to understand where we stood. Slicing my part of the symbol was the best way to do that.” I pressed my fingers against the bridge of my nose. A slow steady thump was beginning just behind my eyes. I eyed my bed for a second, silently wondering if I could work in a nap.

“This can’t be an issue right now, Max. Not when we have this hunt getting ready to go down. I need the two of you to get past your junk long enough to work the job. Then you can slice each other to pieces for all I care. Understand?” he asked, 

“It’s not an issue. I’ll do the job. But, when it’s over, I’m done.” I looked at Dean carefully, watched his emotions run over his features, struggling with what he wanted to say. He finally took my hand and tugged me to the bed.

“Sit down for a minute,” he said.

“I don’t need a therapy session right now, thanks. I’ve got to go speak with Jax and Charlie. I’ve got some ideas about formation I want to work through with them.” I tried to pull away from him towards my door; but, he gripped my hand tight and tugged down.

“I’m not gonna shrink you, Max. Just listen for a minute.”

I looked at Dean’s face and realized he was tired. His eyes were red rimmed and the stubble on his jaw was rougher than usual. He lifted a corner of his mouth in a smile, but I could see the weariness behind it. I squeezed his hand quickly and sat facing him, legs crossed.

“You know when he left last year, he came back almost immediately.” I blinked at him, surprised by the admission, but not surprised by the news. When I remained silent, Dean continued. “It took him three days to get his head worked out, but he did come back. He knocked on my door in the middle of the night. I hardly recognized him when I opened the door. He just looked at me and said, ‘I messed up, Dean.’” 

I scooted away from Dean, slid back to lean against my headboard. My face remained neutral, but I could feel my hands starting to shake. 

“He was here for six days before he left again,” Dean confessed.

“Six days? How did I not see him? I was all over the compound that week, trying to keep myself busy.” I thought back over everything I’d done during that time. I didn’t sleep much for a while after Sam left. When I slept, I dreamt of him. So, I worked the compound. Did all the little odd jobs that everyone was always putting off. I was pretty sure that was the same week I’d categorized the pantry from top to bottom.

“He stayed in the panic room downstairs. I’d check on him and catch him pacing the floors over and over,” Dean said.

“He’d just lost Mark in St. Louis. I’m sure he had some grieving to do.” Saying Mark’s name was difficult. I hadn’t spoke of him in over a year but, I’d thought of him daily. He’d slipped through my fingers during the hunt. Literally. I’d been too weak to pull him back onto a walkway. I’d watch him fall to his death, while Sam screamed for Mark to hold on.

“That had something to do with it. But, Sam had lost so much more, and I watched him slowly unravel in front of me.” Dean looked at me closely, held my eyes with his, while I let this information sink in.

“I was just a couple hundred feet away. If he’d really wanted me then, he could have come to me.”

“Could he? Really? Would you have let him apologize?” Dean asked, eyebrows raised. I knew what he was thinking. It had been eighteen months and I still had not allowed him to apologize. Why would I have allowed it just a few days after the ordeal?

“I didn’t leave, Dean. He knew where to find me if he wanted to talk. He’s known where I was this whole time, and I didn’t hear from him. Not once. He couldn’t even look at me when he left. He didn’t want me.”

I’d started picking the bare threads hanging from the hem of my t-shirt. I was shaking worse now, my whole body set in vibrate mode while my mind waged war with my heart.

“He did look at you,” Dean said softly. My eyes shot to his.

“What?” I asked.

“He did look at you after that day. Before he left for good, he came into this room to see you again.”

I glanced around the room as if I would find some sign of Sam’s presence. My eyes worked over the things on my dresser and glanced at the pictures I had framed on the wall. Sam had not been here, had not come to see me. The last I’d seen of him during that time was his back turned to me while he stormed from the Dining Room.

“You were sleeping. It was late and you’d just gotten back from a supply run. I walked him to your room and opened the door. We saw you curled up on this bed, wrapped in one of Sam’s sweatshirts. I stood outside while he said goodbye.”

My mind flashed to a memory. A foggy image of Sam leaning down and kissing me on the forehead. He’d whispered, “I’m sorry, baby. I have to go, but I’ll be back for you. When you can forgive me, I’ll be back.”

I’d thought it was a dream, one of the many scenes my brain had played in my mind to give me some sort of closure. I remember mumbling, “I love you,” and reaching for him as he backed out of the door. His face had been haunted, dark shadows playing across his features.

Dean watched me closely as I worked through the memory. Recognition must have hit my eyes because he smiled sadly at me.

“I thought you should know,” he said as he stood to leave the room.

“Does Sam know you’re telling me about this?” I asked.

“No. You know Sam. He wants you to come to him because you want to, not because you’re learning of his stalker tendencies.”

I laughed for a quick second and then glared at Dean.

“What?” he asked.

“Why didn’t you tell me then? Why not help us both back then?” If I had known Sam was on site, things may have been different. It would have been ugly for a while, but we’d had eventually learned to exist in the same place. 

“It wasn’t my place to fix you. You both had stuff to work out.”

“Oh, fuck that! You should have told me, Dean! He’s been gone for so long. Didn’t you want your brother here?” I could feel the anger starting to seep into my cheeks. 

“I did see him, Max. Often. A couple of times a month, we’d meet up somewhere or he’d call to check in. I didn’t go without Sam.” 

I felt the anger turn to rage. At Sam. At Dean. At what I thought was their selfishness. But, mostly I was seething with jealousy. I’d needed Sam, needed him in ways that physically wrecked me, and Dean had had him this whole time. He hadn’t lost any time with his brother. I’d lost everything.

“Get out of my room,” I demanded and swiftly pulled the door open.

“Max—” he started.

“Get out, Dean. I can’t look at you right now.” My mind was racing. I didn’t know I’d had a choice. I didn’t know Sam had been waiting for me to give him a sign to come back. I thought I’d been abandoned by him.

I slid my hand under my shirt and felt the sting of the wounds I’d put in my own side. The break in the symbol seemed too much for me now. Heartless and childish. Sam had been telling the truth. He was my constant. The problem was that I hadn’t been his constant. I’d given up before even attempting to fight. I’d let him go and hadn’t thought for a second I had the power to bring him back.

Dean nodded at me slowly and walked from the room, pulling the door shut with him.

I stood in the center of the floor and considered my options. Chewing my lip, I glanced at my closet door. I knew that behind it hung the sweatshirt I’d been wearing the night Sam had said goodbye. 

I walked over and ripped the door open. Pushing aside my dresses and such, I found the sweatshirt in the back of the closet. I pulled it from the hanger and held it up in front of me. Stanford was boldly printed across the chest in white stitched letters. I pulled it to my face and inhaled, trying to catch the scent of him. But, that smell had long worn off. Now it smelled of cedar and dust.

I made a hasty decision and, sweatshirt in hand, walked quickly from my room, down the corridor towards the brothers’ wing. When I got to Sam’s door, I stood studying the wood for a few seconds while working up the courage to knock. Three short raps later, the door opened and Sam stood looking at me. His eyes wandered down to the shirt in my hands before turning his questioning eyes back up to mine.

“I thought you’d want this back,” I said and held the sweatshirt out to him. “I’d forgotten I had it or I would have put it with your things before now.”

“It’s yours now. I gave it to you,” he said.

“Take it,” I pleaded with him, my voice growing thick.

He reached for it but then hesitated. His eyes locked with mine and I caught the flash in them before he pulled me to him. His mouth was on me before I could protest.

I groaned loudly into his mouth, which caused him to grip me tighter to him and pull me through the door. He turned with me pressed against him and kicked the thing shut, reaching behind himself to bolt it. His mouth never left me. He bit my lip sharply, probably drawing blood. I felt the shock shoot straight to my core. I moaned, my mouth opening to his. His tongue rolled over mine and I greedily suck on it. He gripped my waist hard and turn us to slam me up against the wall. Lifting me, he wrapped my legs around his waist. His hands slid up my sides, pulling my t-shirt up with them. When he realized I was bra-less he groaned low in his throat, sounding like a caged animal. He pulled his mouth from me and looked at me. I dug my fingers into his shoulders and tried to tug him back to my mouth. But he resisted, only grinding his hips into me roughly. My eyes fluttered closed.

“No, look at me,” he demanded. When i didn’t do ask he asked, he stilled his hips and practically yelled, “Max, look at me.”

My eyes flashed open and locked with his. I was on fire, my body burning everywhere we touched. His eyes looked wild, animalistic.

“Is this ok?” he asked gruffly. I looked at him and bit my lip. His eyes shifted to watch me gnaw on myself. “You have to say it, baby. Is this ok?”

“Please,” I begged and wrapped my legs tighter around him.

“Say it,” he commanded.

“I need you, Sam. Please. Don’t stop.” 

I’d barely gotten the words out before he was turning us towards his bed. He carried me easily across the room and tossed me down on my back. With quick ease, he tugged my sweatpants over my hips, down my legs, and tossed them somewhere across the room. 

“Oh, god,” he moaned when he saw I wasn’t wearing panties. His eyes skimmed up my body to where my shirt was gathered around my chest. “Take it off.”

I sat up slowly, my eyes locked with his as I hooked the shirt with my fingers. I peeled the material from my body and then laid back for him, naked, my body melting into his mattress.

His eyes roamed over me and settled on the slashed ink on my side. He pulled his shirt over his head and revealed his own ink, unmarred and stamped black against his skin. I reached a hand out and ran my finger tips along the detail. It was beautiful, intricate. Mine. My eyes roamed up his torso and over his face until our eyes met. He looked angry as he unbuttoned his jeans and shoved them and his boxers down his legs, kicking them off behind him. It was his turn to make a point, and he quickly slid down and over my body, keeping his chest lifted from mine. The tattoos met, skin to skin, and I watched the design become whole. My chin trembled at the sight and I had to close my eyes to burn the image into my brain.

“This is constant. It’s always constant,” he growled at me. I ran my hand up his chest to his shoulder and pulled him down to me.

He settled between my legs and his sex brushed against mine. I whimpered from the friction. His hands fisted in my hair as he brought his mouth back to mine, greedily pulling the kisses from deep inside me. I dug my fingers into his back and lifted my hips. 

“Sam, please,” I begged again. My voice sounded heavy and slurred. 

“Tell me what you want,” he whispered as he shifted his lips to my neck and dropped a hand to greedily grab my breast. I lifted my hips again, using my body to convey the message. “No, Max. Tell me. I want to hear you say it.”

“Inside me, Sam. I want you inside me,” I breathed. He pulled back to stare down at me.

“Why?” he asked, our bodies wrapped together. I felt him shift his hips and felt the head of his cock push against my sex. I groaned and tried to pull him into me. “Why, Max?”

I locked my eyes with his. My lips trembled and I felt the tears start to sting.

“Because I need you,” I whispered.

“No. Give me more. Why do you need me?” He withdrew his hips a little from me. The absence of pressure made me cry out. I felt the tears slip from the corners of my eyes and run down my cheeks into my hair. His face softened and he brought his face down to nudge my nose with his. “Baby, please. I need to hear it. I’ve been waiting to hear it for more than a year. Why do you need me?”

I shuddered under him just once before I drew a breath in and looked directly at him. I ran my hands up his body to cup his face. I needed this to be intimate. He needed to understand what was happening inside me, needed to know the slow ache that was pulsing through my heart. 

“Because I love you,” I whispered. “Oh god, Sam. Please. I love you.”

He squeezed his eyes shut for a second and I watched the pain, then relief wash over his features. When he opened them to look at me again, I could see my Sam, the Sam who protected me, worshiped me, belonged wholly to me. He brushed his thumb across my cheek, taking tears with him. I brought my hand to his and our fingers locked tight together. He pushed our hands up over my head and grabbed my hip with his other hand. 

And then slowly, keeping his eyes locked on mine, he slid into me. I felt myself pulse around him as he pushed deeper. 

“Jesus, you’re so tight,” he groaned and I laughed a little.

“I’ve been waiting for you,” I said to him and watched his eyes burn with something pure. “Just you, Sam. It’s always just you.”

He pulled almost all the way out of me and pushed back in a little rougher. I threw my head back and moaned loudly. My body rose to meet him, an instinct that was engrained in my being. 

“More,” I pleaded. He pulled out again and then slammed hard into me. 

I thought I would unravel beneath him. And I fought my body to control the sensation. I didn’t want this to be hurried. I didn’t want it to end. As long as we were here, in this moment, I could keep Sam with me.

I dug my heels into his ass and pushed him deeper inside me. I could feel him hit the back wall of my vagina and I sucked in a breath. He fit inside me perfectly, just as he always had. He ground his hips against me, his pubic bone grinding against my clit. I called out for him, screamed his name as he pounded back into me.

He dropped his mouth to my ear and whispered, “You feel so good. Wet and warm.” I felt my sex constrict around him, felt the wetness slide over him. He could feel I was close and he backed off, making me openly pout. He chuckled in my ear, slid his tongue over my earlobe before he sucked it into his mouth. “Not yet, baby.” And then he rolled us over until I was draped across him. 

I smiled to myself, power surging through my body as I sat up, straddling his cock. I ground my hips down hard against him and lifted my arms up and locked them over my head. Looking down at him, I smiled devilishly while he ran his hands up along my sides until he could cup both of my breasts in his hands. Slowly, he ran his thumbs over my nipples and I threw my head back from the sensation. When he squeezed one hard between his thumb and forefinger, I moaned his name loudly.

And then I rode him, setting a slow steady pace that I knew would drive him wild. We locked our hands together tightly and our eyes stayed on each others’. 

“You’re so beautiful,” he whispered to me and I smiled down at him, grinding down on him until he was buried to the hilt.

“Tell me what you want, Sam,” I teased, a wicked smile on my mouth.

“This. This is all I want,” he said thickly.

“No,” I said, throwing his words back at him. “I have to hear you say it.” I slid back up him and then slammed myself back down. His eyes rolled back in his head. “Tell me, Sam. Tell me what you want.”

“You. Fucking me,” he breathed out.

“When?” I asked.

His eyes locked with mine again. “Always.”

“No more leaving me,” I said as I picked up the pace of my hips.

“Never again, Max. I promise,” he said.

“Why?” I asked through a moan. He grabbed my hips and stilled my movements. Sitting up, he wrapped his arms around me, pressing his chest tight against me.

“Because I love you. I love you so fucking much. I’ve ached for you, for your body, for your scent, for your smile. I won’t leave you again.”

I watched him for a moment, and then we were moving together, sliding into each other over and over. Our movements became hasty, breathless, as we fucked away the pain of the last eighteen months. Our bodies were hungry for each other and we fed completely. 

When he moved his hand between us and pressed his thumb to my clit, I felt myself tighten. 

“Come with me, Sam,” I moaned. he pressed my clit harder and I ground down on him. I wanted him to feel me explode around him, wanted him to feel me sucking at his cock.

“Look at me. I want to see your eyes when I make you come,” he commanded. 

I opened them and locked with his. He slid his thumb one last time over my clit and I screamed out his name. My body unfurled around him, gripping and pulsing. And with our eyes locked, I watched his face change, watched his eyes burn with pure lust as he started to shudder inside of me. I could feel him come deep inside me, could feel him pouring into me. 

He leaned forward and bit into my shoulder. The swift flash of pain from his teeth mixed with the heat pulsing through my body. I squeezed around him again and listened to him groan.

We stayed wrapped together until our breathing had calmed down and our heart rates were back to normal. I etched my fingers along the muscles of his arms, watched as his skin broke out into goosebumps from my touch. I leaned over and licked the hollow at the base of his throat before kissing my way up his neck back to his mouth. He kissed me slowly, like a starving man who would never get to taste me again. An ache resonated through my heart.

When he shifted us in the bed, it was only to lay us down. He tucked me against him tightly and inhaled the scent of my hair.

“Next time, I want to taste you,” he whispered. I shivered at the thought.

My eyes grew heavy and I snuggled into his body. He pulled the sheet up over us and then whispered softly in my ear. “Sleep, my baby. I will be here when you wake up.”

“I love you, Sam,” I mumbled as I started to drift to sleep.

“I love you, too, baby,” he said. “I’m yours, Max. Always.”

My eyes shut and I drifted into a deep, dreamless sleep.


	7. Panicked

I’d been sitting at the operative table in the Meeting Room for hours, diagraming the formation I thought the team should take when we went to Maine. There were nine people on our team, each hunters I’d worked with before and trusted completely. Sam and I had handpicked the team, each person carefully considered for their special skill set. Not all of them were specialized Vamp hunters, but they’d all encountered the blood suckers at some point in their careers. Jax and Charlie were going to go into the heart of the building with Sam and me, while the others stayed in various places around and inside the building. We’d all be armed with our blades and multiple syringes of dead man’s blood. Dean and I had also discussed the possibility of milking the basilisk fangs and mixing them with the blood we needed to form a different sort of syringe option. 

Our eyes in Maine had counted fifteen Vamps going in and out of the building the Alpha had made his home. I was sure the Alpha had a guard though that was with him at all time. We were planning for at least twenty-five on site. Anymore than that, and we may run into a serious problem.

The tension in the compound these days was electric. People were excited about the mission, but they were also leery of its success. Hunters had never banded together like this to take down such a large target. And, we all knew why. Hunters were used to working alone or in very trusted pairs. Our jobs required a kind of synchronization that large groups could not usually accomplish. We had to be able to read each other with just the flash of a look or a nod of the head. That sort of ability between people took years to strengthen and perfect. If the team successfully pulled this off, it would be a first in our history. If we all survived, it would be a miracle.

I stood to my feet and stretched my arms high above my head, rolling my head in circles to get the kinks out of my neck. My lower back was sore and I could feel a tension headache pulsing near the base of my skull. I needed a long, hot shower, but that would have to wait. We were in our final stages of planning and were set to leave the compound the next morning.

Three vehicles were going, but we were all taking different routes to stay inconspicuous. Sam and I were taking the Impala and driving the straightest line. We’d get to Maine a day before the others and set up camp just outside of Ashland. The other two vehicles were looping around some, on different paths, and would arrive roughly eight hours apart from each other. Once we were all set up and had checked in with the Maine Hunters, we’d head out to Van Buren and take the Vamps down. Hopefully, we wouldn’t encounter any other monsters on our way. If we did, the schedules would have to be updated.

My phone buzzed on the table and I picked it up to read a text from Dean. Supply dump. Meet in the panic room. I still wasn’t sure why we were organizing our gear in the panic room. Dean had said something about safety and traitors, but I knew that no one on this compound would dare betray the Winchesters. It seemed like overkill to me. 

I walked into the Den and ran my hand along the top of the door frame until I felt the button that would unlock the panic room. I heard the click of the trap door and bent down to work my fingers into the seams of the hardwood floor. Lifting the hatch, I lowered myself into the small space and pulled the hatch closed over me. As soon as it was locked, the emergency lights flickered on and lit the hallway. I could see the panic room door open at the end. Voices echoed towards me, and I realized Dean and Sam were arguing. I watched Dean cross by the door, one hand running roughly through his hair. I walked silently towards them, straining to hear what they were saying.

“…about her, you’d understand where I’m coming from,” Dean said.

“I do understand where you’re coming from. But, you aren’t listening to me. It’ll be ok. We’re ok. It’s not going to be a problem,” Sam argued.

“It’s too dangerous, Sammy! She could cloud your judgement. Hell, I know you’ll cloud hers. When it comes to you, she has tunnel vision,” Dean shouted.

My heart started to pound harder, the anger starting to pulse through my blood. Dean was doubting my ability to be professional on a hunt, doubting I could do my job with Sam close by. 

When I got to the door of the panic room, my eyes swept from wall to wall. There were no supplies in sight. My instincts told me I was being set up, and, since I knew Dean had a habit of locking people up to supposedly keep them safe, I decided to stay in the doorway, away from the belly of the room.

Sam saw me first. He glanced at Dean and then back at me, rolling his eyes. I cleared my throat, drawing Dean’s attention to me.

“Max,” he said sternly.

“Sounds like we have something to discuss,” I said, leaning up against the doorjamb. I raised an eyebrow at him.

“I think you should stay here,” he said matter-of-factly, facing me head on. I glanced over at Sam who was looking back and forth between the two of us. He looked amused.

“Yeah, I heard. Think my girl parts are going to get in the way, huh?” I asked. Dean just looked at me. “You realize the hunt would have been much more dangerous before Sam and I worked our shit out, right?”

“That’s why I never intended to let you go,” he said.

The shock ran down my spine and I took a step into the room towards him. 

“Are you serious? I helped plan this mission! I assembled the team. You let me do all that work knowing you weren’t going to let me go?” I was shouting now and Sam had walked over beside me. I wasn’t sure if it was for comfort or to keep me from clawing his brother’s eyes out.

“Calm down, Max,” Dean said. “This is for your safety and Sam’s. If the two of you go in there and one of you gets compromised, do you think you will actually be able to sacrifice each other?”

“Sacrifice each other? What the hell, Dean! We’d do what the job required from us. We always do what the job requires.” I glanced over at Sam and saw him nod towards his brother. “Plus, Sam has to have a partner. None of the others can do it like I can.”

“I can,” Dean stated.

I was pretty sure my mouth fell open from the shock. Not only was Dean planning to not let me go, he was planning to do the mission himself. My mission. My Alpha. I started to laugh and watched him look between Sam and me, confusion set on his face.

“What?” he finally asked.

“You have clearly lost your mind,” I said between laughs.

“How so?” he asked.

“You don’t want me to go because you think I won’t be able to sacrifice Sam if it comes to that, but you think you could sacrifice him? You?! The guy who has repeatedly proven if there is one person on this planet you can’t rationally deal with, it’s Sam.”

Dean smirked at me. “Says the girl who essentially turned into a walking zombie when he left last year.”

I stepped in front of him and stuck my finger in his face. “I still did my job, asshole. I still hunted and brought in the kills. Don’t question my professionalism,” I yelled.

“That was small time stuff, Max. This is an Alpha. I can’t have that heart of yours fluttering around and making you stupid.”

“You son of a bitch—” I started and slapped Dean’s cheek as hard as I could. Sam grabbed my wrist and pulled me back, standing between me and his brother. Dean and I glared at each other.

“Alright, everyone just calm down a minute,” Sam said, looking between us. I heard Cas flash in behind us.

“What’s this about?” he asked. I looked over at him and then back at Dean.

“Get your human under control, Castiel, or else I’m going to knock his teeth down his throat.”

Dean snorted. “I’d love to see you try, little girl.”

I lunged for him and felt Sam’s arms come around my waist. He lifted me easily and carried me to the other side of the room. I fought him, kicking and screaming, but his hold didn’t break.

“Get off me, moose!” I yelled at him, but he only squeezed me tighter. When he sat me on my feet, I was pressed against a wall, caged in Sam’s arms on either side of my body. 

Behind him, I heard Dean say, “Get Sam, Cas,” and immediately realized I’d walked right into Dean’s trap.

“Dean, don’t you dare!” I yelled. Sam looked at me in confusion for a second, and then I saw Cas’ hand touch his shoulder. The truth dawned across Sam’s face just as Cas flashed them both from the room. I looked over at the door and saw Dean pulling it shut behind him. 

“I’m sorry, Max,” he said just before the door clicked. I heard the locks slide into place and knew I’d been trapped.

“I WILL KILL YOU, WINCHESTER!” I screamed. The lights flickered for a moment before they went completely dark.


	8. Grand Theft Auto

I’d felt my way along the walls of the panic room until I finally bumped against the table on the back wall. After switching the small lamp on, I’d surveyed my surroundings. The panic room was well stocked for an emergency. There was a supply cabinet that held everything hunters would need to sleep well—things like sleep mats, blankets, and pillows—along with other comforts like toiletries, a coffee pot, and various books. In another cabinet was the food. Ten hunters could survive for two weeks with the food that was stocked carefully. The only door in the room, besides the door out, was one that led to a very small bathroom that held only a toilet and a shower head mounted into the wall. I essentially had everything I would need to last months by myself. So, I knew no one would need to check on me until the hunt had long been done.

I pulled my hair up into a messy bun on my head and walked over to the door leading out. I ran my fingers along the hinges and seams of the door, looking for anything that looked like it might be a weak spot. I knew I wouldn’t find one. There were locks on this side of the door, but they weren’t my problem. If my memory served, there were four locks on the other side of the door, locks I was sure Dean had all fixed into place when he closed me up in here. The doorknob lock was a keypad that needed a code, one I did not know. It activated two steel bolt locks. There were also two slide bars that affixed by sliding them six inches into the steel doorframe. The remaining lock was a steel bolt slide lock that connect the top edge of the door to the top of the doorframe. Each one had been chosen carefully with the intention of keeping something trapped inside the room. 

I backed away from the door and looked up to the ventilation grate above me. I knew when Dean had built this room, he had done it from the plans drafted by Bobby Singer. Bobby’s panic room was famous, one that had seen a lot of action before his house had been burnt to the ground. The design was a work of beauty, but right now, it pissed me off. The grate above was roughly thirty feet above me, and nothing in the room was going to help me reach it. I also knew the walls were thick. Even if I screamed at the top of my lungs, no one would hear. I could essentially be forgotten down here to rot, and no one would be the wiser.

I felt my phone vibrate in my back pocket and pulled it out. A text flashed on the screen from Sam. It was one short sentence. _I’ll get you out._ I thought about how to reply. My first instinct was to say, “You better.” But I knew the hunt was on in a few hours, and Sam didn’t need to be distracted. Distraction led to mistakes, and mistakes led to death. He needed to focus on his job, take down my Alpha, and come home. 

I looked back at my phone and finally texted him back. _I’m fine. Do the job. Come back to me safe. I’m going to kill your brother the next time I see him. So, say your goodbyes_.

I thought about it some more and added, _Tell Cas he’s dead to me._

Putting the phone back in my pocket, I walked over to get my sleeping mat out and set up what would apparently be my bedroom for the next week or so. I grabbed a pencil and pad out of the cabinet and sat at the table against the wall. From memory, I sketched the building where the Vamps were staying. We’d decided the Alpha was staying in one of two grand rooms at the center. They were right next to each other, which made detection a little tricky. If the team stormed the wrong room, it would give away their position and could make the situation very sticky. I hoped Dean would be level headed when he got on the inside and silently clear the rooms before approaching the Alpha’s nest. The more noise the hunters made, the more trouble they could get themselves into.

I worried for a second about Sam. I knew he was one of the best Hunters in the history of this war, but he was human. He’d faced worse. Having Lucifer live in your skin is about as bad as it could get. But, he’d survived it, even if he had been a little scarred from the whole ordeal.

When I’d met him, I’d only heard the rumors that had circulated about his mental state. I’d been surprised to find him so normal. He didn’t talk much about his time in the cage, didn’t talk about the mental roulette Lucifer had once played in his head, and certainly didn’t talk about the hell he’d gone through when he’s been reacquainted with Lucifer just before the gates of Hell has been closed for good. But, I knew those things played havoc with his mind at times he least expected it. Cas had once taken away the worst of the anguish from Sam’s mind, but parts lingered in the dark recesses. Occasionally, they’d move to the forefront of his thoughts.

If I were honest with myself, I was more worried about Sam not coming back. The thought of it ripped a hole in my heart. I’d only just gotten him back, and we hadn’t really talked through everything that needed to be discussed yet. We were moving in the right direction. But, St. Louis still needed to be hashed out. To lose him before we’d completely healed each other would wreck me in ways I couldn’t imagine.

I took my phone back out of my pocket and texted Sam one more time. _I love you doesn’t even begin to cover it._

He texted me back almost immediately. _Words to explain it don’t exist. But the best I have is I love you, too. Be safe for me. Always._

Thirty seconds later another text came through. _Turn your damn phone off to save the battery. You may need it._

I texted back _bossy_ before powering down my phone. I laid on my mat and watched the ventilation fan swirl above me. Hours passed and when it finally grew dark outside, I fell asleep, curled into a ball on my side, thinking of Sam.

*******

I awoke suddenly, and it took me a minute to figure out where I was. It was still dark outside, but there was a light illuminating the room that shouldn’t have been there. I sat up and glanced around, my eyes settling on the door that was now hanging open. The emergency lights from the hallway were pouring through the entry way. I rose quickly and scanned the room. When I reached for the knife in my waistband, I silently cursed myself. I didn’t have a weapon on me. My blade was packed away in my room with my other gear. I grabbed the pencil I’d used earlier from off the floor and held in tightly in my fist. It was the best I had.

Slowly, I walked to the door and looked down the hall. Nothing was there. The lights were glowing dim and I could see the hatch open leading into the Den. I scanned the panic room one more time before stepping through the door and down the hall. When I reached the ladder to climb out, I looked up. The Den lights were off. I was going to have to crawl in blind. If there were any definite danger, someone would have sounded the alarm. But, it was possible something had gotten onto the grounds without triggering anything. I backed away from the hatch opening and the ladder and pulled my phone out, turning it back on.

I quickly sent Sam a text. _Something let me out. Crawling up into the Den now. Need you here._ I pressed send and shoved my phone back in place. Taking a deep breath, I climbed the ladder up to the Den. When my head broke through the hatch opening, I stopped and looked around, my eyes squinting in the darkness. Nothing moved. There was no sound. I quickly made my way up and out and backed myself up to the wall. I felt around for a second and flipped the switch on. The room was flooded with light, and I quickly realized no one was there. My phone buzzed.

_You’re safe. Meet me at the Impala. I have all your stuff._

I grinned to myself and took off down the corridor. When I walked through the door to the outside, Sam was standing in front of me, leaning against the Impala, smiling.

“How’d you manage that?” I asked.

“Had a little help,” he said and nodded to my left. I looked over and saw Cas standing a few feet away.

“Castiel?” I glanced back at Sam and watched him nod.

“I didn’t like the idea of being dead,” Cas said. 

“But Dean—” I started.

“I can handle Dean. You two go now. You have a few hours before he discovers you’re gone.” Cas smiled at me and disappeared.

I walked over to Sam, who was holding my door open for me. He gave me a quick peck on the lips before I slid onto the seat and shut the door. When he was behind the wheel of the car, he looked over at me.

“Ready?” he asked, a grin playing across his face.

“He’s gonna kill us,” I said and looked back to the door of the compound, half expecting Dean to be standing there.

“He’ll survived. It was dick move locking you up.” The Impala roared to life and we took off down the road. Popping open the glove box, he asked me, “Where’s our first stop?”

I grabbed a road map and studied our options. “He’s expecting us to be in Billings. So, how about Idaho Falls?” I looked over at Sam. 

“Sounds good to me.” He tossed his phone at me. “Turn our trackers off. It’ll be the first thing he tries.” I smiled at him wickedly and slid over beside him. 

“I love the way your brain works,” I said as I settled in. I worked on our phones for a few minutes and then tossed them on the dash. “Let me know when you want me to drive.”

“Not gonna happen,” he smirked. 

“We should just get our own,” I said.

“Our own what? Impala?” he asked.

“Doesn’t have to be an Impala. Just something like it. Something better.”

“Max, there isn’t anything better,” he said. “But if you want a car, we’ll get you one when we get back.”

I smiled up at him. Yeah, we had a major hunt on our horizon, but for the next few days, it was just us. I couldn’t think of anywhere I’d rather be.


	9. Car Sickness

It hadn’t taken long for our phones to start ringing. We’d toyed with the idea of answering them and taking our verbal lashing, but Sam was convinced if we waited a little longer, his brother would calm down some. I wasn’t so sure. The farther we got from the compound and the more I thought about Dean, the guiltier I felt. Yeah, he’d been an asshole locking me in the Panic Room, but I knew he’d done so because he loved both his brother and me. He’d eventually track us down, and I wondered what that would do for the hunt ahead of us.

Sam had gotten quiet on our drive, so I knew he was working out this situation with his brother in his head. Dean acted on gut instinct 95% of the time, even with Cas trying to talk to him rationally. Sam knew his brother would come to Maine for the hunt. And it had long been known that the brothers’ biggest weaknesses were each other. Having them at the same place for such a big hunt was recklessly dangerous. I knew Sam was working that danger out in his mind. 

I watched him while he drove, studied the way his mouth turned down at the corners while he was thinking. There was worry etched across his brow and his brown eyes were far away in thought. When I reached for his hand, he jumped a little, like he had forgotten I was there.

“I don’t have to go, you know,” I said softly. I squeezed his fingers gently. He glanced at me once, then twice, before pulling the car over on the shoulder. He sat staring at me for a moment before he opened the door and pulled his long frame out of the car. I watched him pace through the windshield for a few moments before I climbed out of the car myself.

“Sam—” I started.

“Shut up, Max,” he barked at me. He held his hand up in front of him, a gesture for me to stop.

“If we’re all there, it could be dangerous,” I said, ignoring him.

“It’s already dangerous,” he growled at me. “Having everyone there won’t change that.”

“But we’ll be too compromised,” I said. “We’ll be too busy worrying about each other to get the hunt done smoothly. If something goes wrong for one of us—”

“It won’t. We have everything worked out.” He stood watching me, his fingers looped through his belt loops. I could see the tension rolling off of him. I slowly approached him and ran my hand along his stomach. He looked down at me, his features frozen, trying not to reveal anything to me.

“Things happen, Sam. We have no way of knowing what may come up. If I need to sit this out, if it will make it easier on you and on Dean, then I will. I’ll go to Maine and help with the set-up. But, if you need me to stay back for the hunt, I will.”

It had started drizzling and I shivered from the cold rain misting across my skin. Sam ran his hands down the length of my arms, as if he were trying to warm me, before he let me go and turned away to think. I heard the phone in his pocket vibrate for the hundredth time. He reached for it and I watched as his shoulders slumped. Turning back to me, he raised the phone to his ear, hitting the answer button.

“Yeah,” he said into the phone. He kept his eyes on me while Dean was talking.

“Just over state lines,” he said, giving away our location. I glanced around us, but could see nothing but woods.

“No, we changed our course.” He paused a second before sighing and pulling the phone from his ear. With the push of a button, Dean was on speaker.

“You there, Max?” Dean barked out. I winced a little. When Dean was angry, he would be a real ass. I stepped closer to Sam and the phone.

“I’m here,” I whispered.

“We’ll meet you in Maine in three days,” Dean said. I raised my eyebrows at Sam.

“Who’s we?” I asked.

“Me and Cas,” Dean answered. I felt the dread start to trickle through my system. Me, Dean, and Sam were weathered hunters. But, Cas was vulnerable. Word had traveled fast when he’d fallen. Everyone knew he was mortal now, but they also knew he had remaining angel powers. There were humans and monsters alike who wanted what Cas had to offer.

“Dean, you can’t bring Cas!” I shouted. “He won’t be safe.” I heard Dean snort on the other end of the phone.

“Yeah, well, you and Sam should have thought of that before you pulled this stunt. I have to be in Maine now, and Cas insists he come too.” 

My eyes shot to Sam’s and I felt myself pleading with him. He just stood looking at me. I felt fire shoot up my backbone.

“All four of us in one place is too tempting,” I said. “If others catch our scent, we could be ambushed.”

“Well, we’ll deal with that when it happens, won’t we?” Dean shot back. “Sam, three days.”

“Yeah, Dean. Got it,” Sam said just as the line went dead. He shoved his phone back in his pocket and walked back to the car. I stood in the rain, my hands clenched at my sides. Angry tears swam in my eyes. I hadn’t thought of Cas coming. I knew he could handle himself in a fight, but I also knew it was engrained in his being to sacrifice himself for any of us if it came to that. Losing Cas, in any way, wasn’t an option. He was too important, too precious, and in the time I’d known him, he’d become like a brother to me. The three of us wouldn’t survive if something happened to him, and this time, it would be my fault if anything did.

I pulled my own phone out and called Dean back. I didn’t give him a chance to speak when he answered. “We’ll come back. Right now. We’ll come back and I’ll stay behind with Cas. You and Sam can have this fight.” I knew my voice was pleading and weak sounding, but I didn’t care. I’d fucked up, and I needed to make sure everyone was safe.

“Too late, Max. We can’t lose the time it would take for that to happen.” Dean’s voice seemed calm, but I suspected there was a war waging within him.

“Dean, what can I—” I started.

“You can’t, kid. You can’t do anything. Go to Maine. Get your head together. We’ll meet you there.”

“I’m sorry, Dean,” I whispered. “This isn’t how I wanted this to go down.”

“I know,” he said, his voice softening some. “We’ll work it out when we all get together.” He paused for a second and I heard him take a breath. “I’m sorry, too, kid. I shouldn’t have ambushed you. I’ll see you in Maine.” He ended the call before I could respond.

When I heard the Impala roar to life behind me, I turned and started back to the car. Sam watched me through the windshield and leaned over to open my door for me. I climbed in and balled up in the seat beside him, folding in on myself as I considered everything that was coming. My teeth started chattering as we pulled back on the road, and Sam turned the heat on full blast try to warm me up. 

“It’ll be ok, Max. We can handle this fight,” he said. 

“If anyone finds out we’re all there, that we’re all out in the open like that…” I let my voice trail off, too scared to finish my sentence.

“They won’t,” he said. “We’ll get in and out before anyone knows.” 

I turned to stare out of the window, my knees pulled up to my chest, my head resting on them. The woods flew by outside the window, the rain distorting them as we drove.


End file.
